My Past Work

Crack Cocaine

I invented crack in my teens when I was working on a science fair project... My project was to find something really addictive to make money off of.

I Shot Tupac

I wanted to start a huge war between West Coast and East Coast. Or did I? Maybe he just wanted to fake his death and live out the rest of his days in obscurity on an island. Hard to say.

Enron

Yeah that was me.

Kanye West

I made him so I could collect a check and make white people uncomfortable.

Want to make sure I'm the right man for your crime? Take a look at my past work. Might even give you some ideas.